June 8, 2010
I watch Spiderweb struggle in vain with his keys. He can't get them to part with his steed. I ask him to leave them in. Just as we dismount our steeds, I decide to give his keys a tug to see if I can get them out. I expected a brief struggle but struggle I do not, for the keys slither out with ease. Spiderweb's numb hands cannot interpret perpendicular, for he keeps tugging them at an angle. So devoid of senses is he.
We make a run for the lone tea stall at South Pullu and beg for heat wrapped in any form they might care to offer us. The hosts bring out a stove, some hot tea and bowls of steaming maggie. They warn us to not get to close to the stove. The body temperature needs to rise slowly to allow the blood flow to adapt. Heat ourselves too quickly and we risk blood clots and losing our appendages. We strip our wet socks off and soak in to the heat.
It would appear that I have network now; for my phone is buzzing. Its Beruoist - a friend and a biker extraordinaire, who will also conquer Khardung la in the days to come. I try to speak, but I cannot breathe. Overpowered by fatigue and fear, I only manage to communicate to him that we had a 'rough time' coming down Khardung la and that I would reconnect with him later. I turn to Spiderweb to check if we wishes to join in the conversation; but Spiderweb has zoned out in entirety. His head perched upwards, his feet hanging above the stove, and a bowl of maggie perched in his palms delivering much needed heat to the rest of his system. He will not speak or move for many moments to come.
I have network, but I haven't a clue as to the whereabouts of Motorbreath and Inder. Their phones are unreachable. I call Satyen in Mumbai, inform him of our location, assure him that we are safe and beg him to inform Motorbreath and Inder as to our whereabouts should he manage to get in touch with them. I also ask him to update the online forum with details on our whereabouts so that if Motorbreath and Inder are unable to reach us, who so ever they got in touch with, would have some semblance as to our location and state.
My phone buzzes again and the name that flashes now, ironical as it may seem, makes my blood boil. Its Motorbreath.
Motorbreath: "We've reached Leh."
Me: "Dude Spidey's hands went cold. He had major trouble riding. We barely made it to South Pullu. Why the fuck didn't you guys wait for us?"
Motorbreath: "Arre dude it started snowing so we panicked and since Inder was not stopping I kept following him."
Me: "Screw Inder. He's not one of us. He's never been one of us. You should have at least waited for us. You are carrying all our emergency medical supplies. Why the fuck couldn't you wait at South Pullu at least?"
Motorbreath: "Arre...it was snowing re."
Me: "..."
Motorbreath: "Anyway, we're waiting for you guys at Inder's hotel."
Me: "..."
He hangs up as do I.
And while I would make my peace with them in the days to come, on this day, at this time, I am enraged.
"Motherfucking pussies. They abandoned us to save their skin. They should have waited for us at South Pullu. There's little danger of them being snowed under out here and even if there's trouble, there's an entire army unit stationed there to help them out. What if something went wrong. What if one of us fell. What if we needed help? What if we never made it down? Its common knowledge that the Karizma has been in trouble the past few days. What if it broke down. What if my steed gave up? Did it not make sense for them to be in a location where they could send us help? And why did Motorbreath volunteer to carry the emergency supplies if he was in such a hurry to leave! Fuck! They just kept riding. Even if something DID go wrong, they are too fucking far away to send us help. FUCK THEM! What's the fucking point of riding in a fucking group if those that ride with you won't be there to protect you. FUCK FUCK FUCK! I've spent the whole fucking ride following Motor so he wouldn't fucking get left behind and THIS is what I get in return... WTF! THIS ISN'T FUCKING FAIR!"
No sooner do I think that, I begin to smile. Figment of my imagination or not, the Universe continues to coax me into growing up. And grow up I do. For the next several minutes I will stand at the door of the lone tea stall at South Pullu and cry, my body shaking with fear, humility and the joy of being alive, of finally finding purpose - one of experiencing all that can be experienced and then some, so that one day, when the Universe is ready to take me, I can look it in the eye and say "Go ahead, take me. For I have seen what I wished to see. Heard what I wished to hear. Done what I wished to do. And now that I have lived and loved and admired your grandeur, it is only fair that I make way for others to experience the grand tour. Thank you. And Good bye."
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