I was born an agnostic, raised to be an atheist and found myself in anti-theism. I will not pretend otherwise, for I believe that the practice of pretense is vastly more disrespectful and perverse than consummate disrespect. As I stand at the shores of the immaculate Golden temple, I can't help but wonder if it would be disrespectful to accept it's embrace for I do not believe. But the tourer in me is quick to add that as an adventurer, and a storyteller, it is my moral obligation to explore and fathom. After all, I don't have to be a Punjabi to appreciate the glory of Punjab and I certainly don't have to be a practioner of religion to marvel at the extraordinary structure that owns the skyline before me. Besides, I do not feel it judging me; nor do I feel an animosity emanating from within its confines for a want of belief. It stands before me, steadfast in its resolve, as if to say, "I am what I am; think what you will of me, for I will think nothing of you." That's all the assurance I need.Weary and thirsty, we drag our baggage to the temple's counter. We must remove our riding gear too. A curious question on our gear, and the gentleman at the counter stacks our luggage, handing us a metal token. Our shoes, we are told, must be deposited at a different counter, across the foyer. I can only presume that the segregation is based on religious convictions and hygiene considerations of the relative impurity of footwear. Specifically, our own footwear most certainly deserves segregation.
Edit - Aman's remark to the above: Nothing like that.. infact giving your time at the shoe counter is consider as Seva (help) and devotees sweep the ground where shoes are parked with their hand, the shoe dust too is considered pure. Segregation is just because all gurudwaras have a shoe counter, but all dont have a baggage counter, this one being a tourist place, has one.
We proceed to quench our thirst with hydrogen concoctions being offered in steel bowls. I take a second helping, followed by two more. We adorn ourselves in orange bandannas and walk towards the entrance. A small enclosure with flowing water cleanses our feet as we walk through it onto blistering marble flooring. And even though my soles of my feet scream in agony, I can't help but stare in awe. The Golden Temple is visual experience photographs can do no justice too. Its aura is overwhelming.
Cameras get whipped out and we get busy. As we make our way through the corridors, I notice devotees plunging buckets of water into a man-made water body within the enclosure and handing them over to what I presume are temple helpers. The helpers, in turn, pour the water onto the blistering marble. Gentle slopes in the architecture ensure that the water makes its way back into the water body as is soothes the surface. We take a peak into the water and find fishes, some white, most gold, listlessly, drifting in no direction in particular. Occasionally, they surface with mouths wide open gesturing us to feed their anatomy. Much to our delight, none are camera-shy.
As we get on to the causeway that leads to the main building of Sri Harmandir Sahib, a bulky sign reminds us that photography is not permitted within its confines. We tuck our cameras away as Aman gives us a background of the temple and its significance. I'm mesmerized by the structure for it seems to come alive as it breathes against the backdrop of a continuous recital of the Guru Granth Sahib. On a higher floor, an eclectic mix of devotees rest their senses. One in particular catches my attention for her eyes reveal a deep sense of anguish as she looks into the distance, perhaps ruminating on the source of her despair. In a bizarre way, I felt deeply connected to her; for as an individual who was once relegated to the confines of an extremely hostile environment, where opportunities for solace were few and the feeling of loneliness was acute, I have been where she rests now. It's a contradiction within in itself; of being lonely in a crowd.
And as we find our way up the stairs, my attentions turn on to myself. For I realize now that I have unfinished thoughts of my own; of an incomplete understanding of myself and of those that I once believed to be close to me... no... within me; of conclusions unconcluded; of hate for the anger within and anger for the hate within; of those that I have chosen to forget for all they remember of me now is that I have been forgotten. As a consumer of physics, I do not believe the Universe conspires against me. It's actions and reactions do not follow paths that are in any way aligned to teach me lessons, to test my mettle, to punish me of crimes committed in a previous life I have since forgotten. Indeed it thinks nothing of me. It follows then that the despair I experience could not be attributed to the actions of those outside of me – for they, just as the Universe, act in a manner that's optimized for their configurations. I believe they call it "their life". They owe me nothing – not one iota of honesty, not one iota of integrity, not one iota of the truth. I have believed and known this for as long as I can remember. What I failed to do was to conclude the obvious. That if I experience loathing for having being misled, for being lied to, for being taking for a ride I would rather not take; it must indeed be towards myself. Myself, for not having recognized their deceit, for having an unquestioning faith in their integrity, for having believed in their lifes, for letting myself being vulnerable to hurt and pain. And so to get rid of the pain and anguish, I must learn to forgive; not them for they are now inconsequential; but myself. I must forgive myself acts of temporary insanity; I must admit to myself that I am not perfect (its harder than it sounds I now believe) and I must allow myself to continue making mistakes for it is through risk, experimentation and excursions into unchartered territories, will I become of true master of the road through life. In summary, I must live as I ride, the two intertwined and inseparable.
Several heartbeats later, we make our way out of the temple. An enthusiastic gentleman insists on posing with us for photographs, one with the group and one with each of us individually. Amused, we grant him his wish. Handshakes, clicks, smiles and we are ready to re-kindle our patriotic spirit. We will now ride to Wagah.
Facebook update: Golden temple - Soul searched, mind blown! Off to woogie woogie wagah!
02 June at 16:36 via Text message
Divya Misra, Sujan Shetty, Tushar Jadhav and Satnam Singh Vohra like this.
Nitin Manore give pet bharke gaalis at 6 pm :D :Ddo take a video if possible.it's an amazing experience to be remembered later.
02 June at 16:39
Satnam Singh Vohra amritsari naan and kulche wid a huge glass of lassi and some paranthas wid chillis-- ahem ahem
02 June at 17:05
Rachit K yeah.. dont miss show at Wagah/Attari Border
02 June at 17:31
Tushar Jadhav bharat mata ki jai.......
02 June at 18:34
Sujan Shetty not bad u made it 5 day
02 June at 18:36
Siddhesh Kulkarni Gud 1 dude... so... on time ?
02 June at 19:49
Divya Misra Where now?
03 June at 11:54
Rachit K ^^ they are on their way to Srinagar from pathankot
03 June at 11:56
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